Things I am not allowed to do in Gnome Land
Chapter 1: 1-20 1: LOCK THE FREAKING DOOR!!! *Pinkalicious saw Norman and Edna having sex. *Edna did not forgive her for a while. *Norman wasn't wearing his briefs, he never forgave her. 2: For the love of Loser336 LynnLoud909, do not change the freaking signs on the bathrooms. *Peter did that to the male gnome bathroom. *Edna and Pinkalicious walked in. *The girls saw Norman and Ringmaster Gnome stark naked. *Norman shrieked while Ringmaster Gnome struggled to grab a towel to cover himself up. *Edna was embarrassed and Pinkalicious's cheeks turned bright pink. *Edna said "Seeing you and Norman with your dicks out wasn't on my agenda." *Norman was super pissed off and Ringmaster Gnome was like "Hello ladies..." 3: Making a parody of Stacy’s Mom called Edna's Granny Gnome is not really that funny. *Edna finds it uncomfortable that her friends talk about how “sexy” her Granny Gnome is. *”Edna's Granny Gnome has got it going on, Edna's Granny Gnome had got it going on” 4: I will not snap female gnomes' bras. 5: I will not break Edna's glasses. She can't see two feet in front of her. 6: I am not allowed to strip Norman naked, nor anyone else, period. * Norman's still traumatized. 7: I will not point at Edna's breasts and ask "Are those real?" then fondle them. 8: I will not sneak up to any female gnome, flip their skirt and pull their tights and underwear down to knee-length. 9: Showing the gnomes a pornographic anime is prohibited. 10: Making the gnomes watch 2 Girls 1 Cup results in supsension. * Ringmaster Gnome couldn't drink from a cup for a week. * It traumatized Edna. 11: For the love of Gnome Land Man Tits, Stop freaking out when girl gnomes start bleeding once a month! * Easton noticed blood dripping down Edna's leg, * Kayla's are pretty heavy! * Edna doesn't need to be checked 3 times a week! * She threw a tampon at Chris. 12: Viagra is banned from the premises forever, period. * Norman's erection lasted 3 hours, poor him, Chris mixed his coffee with Viagra. 13: When playing 7 or 11 minutes in heaven, don't partner Ringmaster Gnome with Edna * He ejaculated over her face when she touched his genitals repeatedly * He was pissed * Norman was laughing too hard to help 14: I will not lock Ringmaster Gnome and Edna in the same room to see what happens. * Edna had her breasts exposed. 15: I will not call Ringmaster Gnome by his first name (Richard). * Ringmaster Gnome never forgave Norman. 16: For the love of god, DO NOT MENTION UNIT 731 OR THE BATAAN DEATH MARCH AROUND GNOMES, EVER! * Ringmaster Gnome went into a corner * Chris never went near Pinkalicious * Melvin yelled at Pinkalicious * Carley never forgave Peter 17: Singing "Cold as Ice" while drunk results in severe punishment * Edna face-palmed in anger. * Serenity was told never to go near beer again. 18: "It's Everyday Bro" by Jake Paul is banned infinitely. * Echo and Raleigh got so offended. * Ringmaster Gnome really hates that song 19: The following "awful" or inappropriate animated programs and pilots are monitored: * Johnny Test (The first season is better.) * Drawn Together (Edna had to go throw up in the toilet after being forced to watch Dirty Pranking No. 2 by Chris) (I'm surprised we're still allowed to watch this) * Mr. Pickles (Too ugly. Bleh....) * Striperella (Ms Andie had to enable parental controls so her kids wouldn't see it) (Yes, the series was that inappropriate) * Boohbah * Breadwinners (What....the.....ass, Ringmaster Gnome never thought Nickelodeon had the fucking balls to make this. Bridget and Carley went hunting in the nearest duck pond, brought back dead ducks, we sent them to Adam. Brianna said "Go home ducks, you're drunk") * Glenn Martin: DDS * Allen Gregory * The Groovenians (We thought that it was made on drugs.) * Pinky, Elmyra and the Brain * Freak Show (Edna had to vomit in the toilet after being forced to watch the entire series by Chris.) * Camp Lazlo (Serenity turned away from the ugly animation) * Uncle Grandpa (Luna thinks Uncle Grandpa is a pedophile and was up all night looking for flying trailer vans) * We Bare Bears * Mega Babies (Let's hope that this gets banned from Gnome Land) * Little Shop (Ruined the Little Shop of Horrors legacy) * Ren and Stimpy: Adult Party Cartoon (This and Mega Babies should be banned from Gnome Land if they aren't already) * Coconut Fred's Fruit Salad Island (I thought it ripped off Spongebob Squarepants) * Pinky Dinky Doo (Here's one cartoon that Grace doesn't care for at all) (I'm surprised we're still allowed to watch this) * Miracle Star (A Gumball rip-off) * Caillou (Norman banned Norman Jr. and Emily from watching it because he feared that the titular character would have a bad influence on his kids' behavior.) 20: The following opening/closing logos/bumpers are monitored * Walt Disney Neon Mickey (Catherine was shocked by it) * Viacom V of Doom (Ringmaster Gnome saw it as a sliced devil's finger) * Screen Gems S from Hell (Uh....Don't get me started on this.) * Timpson Films (It scared the fuck out of Edna. She buried her face into Ringmaster Gnome's crotch. He said it tickled. Chris laughed at her) * AKA Cartoon Falling Guy (Norman and Echo thought it was disgusting. Ringmaster Gnome said "It looks like a fucking monster impaled by a weapon!") * Adult Swim "The Dawn is Your Enemy" (Adam vowed to himself not to watch any more Adult Swim for as long as he lived.) * Family Home Entertainment Notepad (I'm mystified as to why Edna and Grace enjoy it, because everyone else was either neutral or against it.) * DiC Kid in Bed (Ms Andie thought as if the kid in bed looked already dead (Rhymes fuck yeah!).) * Ghost House Pictures (Bonnie thought it was cool, but creepy.) * VID Mask (Justice and Daia were frightened by it.) * Pilot Boy Productions (That was a hilarious one!) * Stoopid Monkey * MTV Corpses Calzone IDs (Really?) * Renaissance Pictures (Norman never looked at Mona Lisa the same way again.) * View Askew Vulgar the Clown (All the gnomes thought the clown was perverted.) 21-39 21: The following songs are banned or monitored during ”Embarrassing Songs Blaring Out Prank”: * Suck On My Cock by Matt Rogers (This played out loud in a library. Most of the female gnomes were like “What the fuck?!”, while the male gnomes, except Norman, were laughing. Ringmaster Gnome got in trouble for it) * Any LazyTown song (Yes. All of us understand Stéfan Karl is no longer with us, this is not an excuse to play Mine repeatedly) * Asshole by Denis Leary (Everytime Kayla walks in) 22: Please be careful with using slurs unless the gnome is okay with it. * Edna called herself a bitch in several comments. 23: I will not place hentai, bara, yaoi or yuri manga on manga library shelves. * “WHAT THE FUCK IS FUCKING SHIT?!” ~ Norman's reaction to a bara manga. Bridget almost erupted in laughter at Norman's rant. * Kayla just wanted to read JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure. * Edna erupted in laughter. * “No laughing, Bridget. No laughing!” 24: Do not, and I mean do NOT, use money meant for programs and other sensible stuff to pay for unnecessary shit. * The gnomes found boxes of pizza, a television set, and a Nintendo Switch lying by the door. * When Norman found out that the money for a program was spent on junk, he was pissed off. * He beat Kayla so severely she ended up in the medical bay. * No one (except Edna and Ringmaster Gnome) spoke to Norman for a few days. 25: XXXTENTACION is banned from the base. * Pinkalicious played #I'mSippingTeaInYourHood and now the gnomes are terrorized. 26: Vaccinations are mandatory and must not be cancelled. 27: On second note, EVERYTHING from F is for Family is monitored: * Threatening to "put people through that fucking wall" has become a popular threat to recruits. * Even Echo and Bonnie use it. * Carissa yelled "Vivienne, stop touching my brother or I will put you through that fucking wall!" * Teresa laughed (that’s her new favourite show). * I am amazed we are allowed to watch it. 28: My Immortal by Tara Gilesbie is monitored. * "WHAT ARE YOU DOING MOTHERFUCKERS!" (Ringmaster Gnome yelled that in a meeting room) * "Because I love her!" (Ringmaster Gnome trying to explain himself when he got caught having sex with Edna) 29: Go the Fuck to Sleep is not an appropriate bedtime story. * Norman once read this to Emily. * He actually wet himself from laughing. 30: The following songs are monitored * Unit 731 by Slayer (Echo and Bonnie were shocked and they complained about it after Edna played it very loudly) * I Love You Barney Song * How Bad Can I Be? * Peanut Butter Jelly Time * Cannibal by Kesha * Trust in Me * Korea Does What It Is Determined To Do! (Teresa still plays that) * King for a Day by Pierce the Veil (TURN THAT SHIT DOWN RINGMASTER GNOME!) * Sexy Back by Justin Timberlake (Ringmaster Gnome's new theme song) * Wiggle by Jason Derulo (They hate that, really hate that) * Talk Dirty to Me by Jason Derulo (Daia officially hates me) * Any Frozen song (It drove most of the boy gnomes, and some girl gnomes, NUTS) * Angel of Death by Slayer (It pissed James and John off. Goddammit Edna!) * Nanking by Exodus (Ringmaster Gnome likes that song, despite what it is actually about) * Dr. Heart Stealer by Hiroshi Kamiya (Edna, for the love of god, stop playing that through the speakers! She does this to piss off Chris. Ringmaster Gnome won't stop singing it) * Keep Awake by 100 Monkeys * The P-P-Platypus Song by Steve Axtell (Edna found it addicting.) 31: Never tell the gnomes about Japanese vending machines * Although some were actually amazing, some of them were over-the-top * Like, used underwear * That's RIGHT, used underwear * Cedric was blushing and said he wanted a pair of panties * Edna can't find her pink underwear, and has been wearing her tights without underwear on. Guess how long? A week. * Cedric is a perverted fuck. 32: When also about to watch the following webtoons or webcomics, please notify any officer or commander * Happy Tree Friends (Xavier thought it was the best thing ever. It scared Justice. Juliette likes it) * Dick Figures (Collin and Ringmaster Gnome have been compared to the main characters by Sian) * Dragon Ball: Multiverse (Justice...) 33: Bird is the Word is banned infinitely from the base * Juliette banged her head against the wall * Xavier twitched violently * Sarah loves that song. 34: Angry Grandpa Show quotes are banned * What the fuck are you watching? (Alabama said this when she caught Edna watching Littlest Pet Shop) * Candy Galore! I'm in heaven, I'm in heaven! (Ringmaster Gnome keeps eating sweets) * I put a little Mentos in your Diet Coke, so what? (Ringmaster Gnome tried doing that but it went up his nose) * Touch my candy, I'll break your TV, I'll break your Xbox (Saara said that to Ringmaster Gnome. He wouldn't let her play with his TV or XBOX 360) * (I can't believe we are still allowed to watch this) 35: I will not lock Kayla and Edna in a room to see who can get out alive. Category:List